Top 5 restaurants rated by my kids

About 8 years ago, when my daughter was born, my husband and I had to expand our Friday mornings breakfast for two (in Israel the weekends start on Friday morning and end on Saturday night) at the nearby coffee shop for a breakfast for three, but in that specific forum of three usually only one of us would get to eat, and the other would hold/rock/walk our baby girl around. Pretty soon she was able to sit on her own and munch on some baby food and later on the food on our plate, but that would usually keep her busy for 10-15 minutes tops, so we would either take shifts or eat fast. Same was with our son but now we finally got to that point where we can all go to a restaurant and eat together. My kids have developed their own brand preferences and my daughter was kind enough to jot down a list of her and her brother's favorite restaurants on my iPhone. So all I had to do was copy and paste her original list, I added my kids' favorite and some comments in parenthesis:

1. The Original Pancake House (like many other family friendly places, they understand the importance of keeping the kids busy and offer multifunctional place mates that are also coloring paper and kids׳ menu all in one, and they provide the crayons. My kids' favorite is the kids' scrambled eggs with pancakes on the side).

2. Hinode (Sushi! They have a great lunch buffet)

3. noodles n' company (kids' Mac n' cheese with meatballs on the side)

4. Wendy's (Chicken nuggets and fries. They also have baked potato and chili so we don't consider it as total junk food)

5. Cici's pizza (cheese pizza and brownies for dessert. This is the first food my kids ate in America, we were starving and looked for somewhere to eat, we weren't familiar with popular food chains so we picked the most crowded place in the area).

Of course, being rated as a favorite restaurant for kids is much beyond the food. Coloring paper and crayons are a big plus at certain ages, kids' friendly food, kids' friendly employees, prizes, and also the atmosphere as a lot to it; we used to have a favorite diner at a walking distance, whenever our kids were asked to pick a place to eat they would name that diner until the diner moved. It was only 2 miles away, they did some cosmetic make over, became a bit fancier diner and all of a sudden my kids' didn't like the place anymore. They also tend to be pretty conservative in their choice of dish, once they set their mind on a place it comes as a one complete fixed package, they would expect an identical experience on our next time there, same food, same everything not even a better one, otherwise they will easily ban the place from their list.

Family movie night

Kids should always go to sleep early enough to allow themselves a reasonable amount of hours of sleep. I know that, of course, and I am not going to advocate for sleep depriving your kids but I believe that a tired child will eventually fall asleep and that letting them have a controlled rebel once in a while might even be good for them. For that we have Family Movie Night. We are not staying up all night, just maybe say, one hour past their bedtime (or less for younger children, you don't want them to get to the over tired stage) as long as they complete all their other daily chores; homework, clean up, dinner (yes, for my kids eating is considered a chore), showers etc. Then we all gather around our living room's TV screen, including our family dog, get some snacks (another thing we normally don't let the kids do at night) and pick a family movie, preferably a comedy because the whole purpose of this activity is to have fun and not overload their brains too much before bed). Like every fun thing, too much equals no fun at all, so we try to limit that for once a week or once in two weeks, and pick a day that they are not particularly tired or have the option of staying up a little late the next morning. And the most important part is that we (their parents) sit and watch with them, that's why we call it: ״FAMILY movie night״ to make it a whole family kind of experience. So last night we watched "Home alone 3", we were all laughing out loud like crazy. It is a cute movie but mostly we just enjoyed each other's company, got to cuddle up all in one sofa, including the dog. After the movie the kids went to bed happy and woke up this morning a bit tired but with big smiles on their faces, citing funny text pieces from yesterday's movie and talking about our next Family movie night. For us it's a great way to spend some quality time together.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

Kids are asked this question rather often, and would usually switch their theme once in a while, but a profession that seem attractive and prestigious to us, their parents, would not always seem as much appealing to them. My son was convinced that I worked on the train since before we had a second car dad and him would drop me off at the metro on their way to pre-school, saying that mommy is going to work and everyday on their way back they would pick me up from the metro saying that mommy is back from work. He was really proud and was wondering whether I drive the train or monitor the people going in and out. He was very disappointed when he found out I was just a scientist. He says that when he grows up he wants to be either an astronaut, a soccer player or a helper. I asked what kind of job "a helper" was and he explained that a helper is someone who's job is to help others. Sounds like a broad range of professions, so I asked for an example and he said: "a superhero". But even after you grow up and make your choices, things are not always as clear as they seem when you are a child.
I love science and enjoy taking part in the medical research, but as a graduate student and even as a postdoctoral fellow I always wondered what drives a lab chief or an assistant professor to devote their lives to research? And usually to a very specific field of research. What is their source of motivation, that keeps them so focused on this one thing till the end of their days without looking back? And they usually don't look back.
The day I found my own answers to those questions was the day I made my promise. When my daughter looked at me with desperate eyes asking if her diabetes will ever go away, I just couldn't let her down and said: "yes, when someone finds a cure". She asked how long it would take and I said it will probably take years and that was my most optimistic projection. For her it seemed too long. "But mommy you are a scientist" she said excited. "So go back to work and find me a cure!" And so I made my promise, not totally clear what it would take. But by that I discovered my drive, my motivation and my professional decision. I am not the first scientist to switch her field of interest from these kind of personal reasons and am surly not last. I left my lab and my neuroscience research to a lab deeply focused on type 1 diabetes research and have a smile on my face every morning when I come to work, knowing I no longer have to be helpless in the face of my daughter's diabetes. I am doing the most that I can to change it, I no longer need to look back.

What language do you speak at home?

As much as I love the English language, I don't think I will ever be able to speak English like I speak Hebrew, nor will I ever be able to think, dream and get upset or excited using any other language than Hebrew. This is just the way I am and that is why my husband and I made a decision, to use Hebrew at home. When we speak to each other it just doesn't make any sense to speak any other language than the one we know best, just like it doesn't make any sense (to us) to speak to our kids a language that we are not 100% fluent in. Children's abilities to pick up new languages are far better than adults' and also they have so many different opportunities to speak English with English speakers, they better not learn our grammatical errors or pick up our Israeli accent. Also, we have only been here for 3 years and our daughter is already correcting us when she hears our English, now where does that place us? Her parents, that in the eyes of a young child, are still supposed to know best?! So it is indeed to the best of everyone's interest that we speak Hebrew to our kids and encourage them as much as we can to speak Hebrew with us. I hope that when they grow up they will appreciate being able to communicate fluently in two different languages. Now here comes the strange part of it: I was sure that all of it is as clear to others as it is clear to us but in the last parents teachers' conference in my son's pre-school I was told that my son has some grammatical issues like mixing the order of the words in sentence sometimes or mixing English together with words that were clearly not English. Well, I wasn't surprised but his teachers were confused when I explained that we speak only Hebrew at home. "That means that he learns English only from us..." they were overwhelmed by the load of responsibility. "Well, he does pick it up from TV shows, friends and sometimes from his sister although they mostly communicate in Hebrew with each other" I explained but it didn't seem to ease much of their surprise. Now, with the new information in mind, they were actually impressed by his English communication abilities. If I had known better I would have told them that right from the start.
Sometimes what seems totally obvious to us might be a complete mystery to others, and bilingual kids might have a slower language development but eventually they usually catch up and grow up to have a full fluency in two different languages.

Top 10 items to take on a long flight with young kids

Living thousands of miles away from your home country requires some great degree of travel. For us the routine flight time is around 12-14 hours but we are lucky enough to have a direct flight within a reasonable driving distance. There are people who like to break it down into two shorter flights, I personally find it exhausting, especially with kids, until they finally fall asleep you have to wake them up, get off the plane and switch to a new plane. In the case of my kids, once woken up, they will not go back to sleep within the next 4-8 hours...
My best advice that has proved itself many times is to book a night flight. The kids go on the plane, have dinner, maybe watch a movie and then go to sleep. If you are lucky they will wake up for breakfast, just a little before landing. If not refer to the suggestions below:
1. DVD player, in case the plane is not equipped with individual screens for every seat, along with their favorite DVDs and also get some new ones that they haven't watched.
2. Headphones, in case they do have individual screens for every seat, not all flight companies provide headphones, and some sell it for unreasonable prices.
3. Books, familiar and new ones.
4. Art and crafts projects, depending on the age of the child, but crayons, stickers and coloring books are always good. Warning; don't bring projects that involve handling many items or very small items, they can fall down or scatter around and could lead to a lot of frustrations.
5. A favorite doll/stuffed animal for extra comfort
6. A blanket or snuggie and even a small pillow for a sleepy child. That can become very handy in an air conditioned plane, extra blankets are not always available and even if there are it can take quite a while to get them.
7. Water, formula and some snacks if allowed on the plane (depends on the flight company). And something to drink or chew during takeoff and landing, to ease the pressure on the little ears.
8. A change of clothes and extra diapers and wipes if using. A change of clothes for you as well, just in case.
9. Tylenol/Motrin or any other fever and pain relievers, just in case. Get some for you also.
10. A great deal of energy, patience and sense of humor.

* A secret weapon, to be used only in case you run out of ways to keep them busy and quiet and they can't or won't go to sleep; a few small presents, preferably wrapped and well hidden in your bag. Give them one at a time, this should buy you some more quiet time, and quiet time on a long flight is precious!

Enjoy your flight!

Some tips for sleep deprived parents

Well, I read all the right books but my kids, so it seemed, consistently refused to go by those theories, maybe because they never read those books themselves. There should be a kids' version to go along with the various parents' guides, so the kids know what to expect and what is expected. Bedtime for us, no matter what we did, was a never ending story that would usually extend to a couple of hours and then usually my daughter would ask me to lie down next to her until she fell asleep, but I would usually fall asleep first and wake up several hours later and crawl back to bed, realizing I have no more than a couple of hours to sleep. Falling asleep next to your kids, cuddling together, is great fun but leaves very little (if any) time for yourself (I could deal with that), and not a lot of time to get some real rest (a little harder to deal with).
So, I will not go about describing the unsuccessful attempts to resolve this issue using the pretty common techniques, I can just say what worked for me. Beware, it might take longer then the other techniques, but the good side is that it's user friendly, easy to accomplish and good for the soft -hearted parents (like myself, I admit) because it doesn't involve crying episodes, only positive feedback and rewards.
Plus, the plan was, in part, developed by my kids (with adult supervision) which makes it also kids friendly.
So, that's what we did;
It started with a very exciting declaration (from my side) that they are big kids now (4 and 7 and still need me beside them in order to fall asleep) and as big kids they can finally fall asleep on their own. We went together through the new bedtime routine that will end with one short story for each child or one long story for both, then a kiss goodnight, we turn off the lights and I go out of the room. I promised to check back and see how they were doing within a reasonable time frame (10 minutes?). Now, before they had a chance to realize they might not like the plan, I jumped to the good (for them) part; we made a chart for each child. For every night they fall asleep on their own they get a star. Now here comes the positive feedback part; for the first 3 stars they get to pick a present (Five Below or equivalent) and within less than 5 minutes they added a footnote to the chart; 10 stars=a bigger present, 50 stars=trip, 100 stars=family vacation. Which is a great long term plan in my opinion that we are all going to enjoy. Now, there are no negative feedbacks, other than not getting a star, and once one get a star it cannot be taken away, every star they get is theirs forever. On the first couple of nights they tried (as expected of course) to stretch the limits. How long can mommy stay with them before they go to sleep that would still earn them a star. We agreed on 1 minute once we are finished with reading the story. Now the ball was in their side. They decide whether they want me next to them before they fall asleep or they want a star. I had set up the first 3 stars=present goal since it is a very short term goal to keep them motivated and also let them enjoy the results of their efforts pretty fast after they started, reducing to minimum any chances for disappointment and let them enjoy looking forward for the reward.
And it worked, believe it or not! I finally got my nights back and even have some time to do other stuff that are not related to me being a mom. Once in a while they try to talk me in to staying with them but I remind them that it's either me or a star and usually ("no offense mommy") they prefer getting a star.

Rufus the bear

When my daughter came down with type 1 diabetes she got Rufus the bear as a present that came inside the Bag of hope, that was delivered to us by one of the diabetes educators when we were at the hospital. Diabetes educators are the angels that within all that emotional chaos, show up, return the control back to your hands as much as possible and remind you that, although it might seem otherwise, this is not the end of the world and that life are still waiting for all of you outside, right when you step out of the hospital door. She taught us how to monitor blood sugar, how to count carbohydrates from food, how to give insulin injections, how to calculate insulin doses and also a little bit about how to keep our sanity within all that mess. I remember that my first thought was that our kids are not protected anymore, deep inside I always believed that kids are protected, that everything has to turn out just fine, because they are kids. All of a sudden this bubble did not exist anymore. I was scared, I was terrified, mainly from the uncertainty of what future holds. Rufus the bear came in a big box. It had colorful patches on his arms, legs, belly and buttocks, to mark for all of those areas that can be used for insulin injections. It also had two patches on it's paws, which are the spots used to check blood sugar. My daughter unwrapped the cute bear. The diabetes educator explained that this bear has diabetes too and that she can take care of it and also learn how to take care of herself. My daughter practiced some insulin injections on the bear and checked it's fake blood sugar level. Then she played with it for a while and put it to sleep. A nurse came in with some DVDs for her to watch and she happily switched to watching TV. Seemed like she was taking it all much better than we did. The next day the diabetic educator came to check on her. "How is Rufus doing?" she asked my daughter. "Are you taking good care of him?"
"Oh, I cured him from his diabetes" my daughter answered. "it is enough trouble to take care of me, I don't need another bear with diabetes to worry about". That was one lucky bear.

The tooth fairy

While many kids, including my almost 5 year old son (and also some adults), find a great degree of comfort and joy in the fantasy world, there are kids that find the magical and mysterious quite disturbing. My daughter has always been too rational and too sharp to believe in these things and so when she had her first loose tooth we decided to introduce the tooth fairy concept, thinking that even though she might figure things out pretty quickly, she could still enjoy the fun. Some parents really put time and effort to prepare the setting for a full experience, like using glitters (left over from arts and crafts) on the window seal, buy a roll of golden dollars from the bank, prepare some pre wrapped presents and there is a long list to it. But kids chat and basically tell everything to each other, and my daughter came back from school one day pretty upset after a friend had told her that the tooth fairy replaced the tooth from under her pillow with a present. "I don't want the tooth fairy to take away my tooth, it is my tooth!" she exclaimed. "And why do I have to put it under my pillow? Can't I keep it in a box in my closet?" she asked. "Well of course you can" I try to calm her down "this is your tooth, you decide what you want to do with it". "But will I still get the present?" not that I was surprised to hear that..."yes, you will still get your present, don't worry". So, out tooth fairy is a little different than the other tooth fairies, what could I say? But then came some more questions; How does the tooth fairy know it when a child looses a tooth? How will she know where we live? How does she decide what present to give? Does that depend on the size of the tooth? And lastly, will we allow a stranger fairy to go in our house while we are all asleep? Now for that I wasn't ready... A few days afterwards my daughter's tooth came out and she put it in a special box in her closet, exactly like SHE wanted. Then she told us EXACTLY what she wanted the tooth fairy to get for her. The next morning she woke up very happy to find her present. Then she came down stairs and said with glee: "I know who my tooth fairy is!". "Really?!" I asked. And she said: "yes, it's daddy!"

After school enrichment classes

Maybe it's the over-protective mom in me that speaks out but when it comes to signing up my kids to classes after school and also paying money for them, I am expecting that the kids would at least have fun. Their days at school are full of long hours of listening, learning, paying attention and following rules, with only 30 minutes to run around, play and do what they are originally supposed to do; be kids. 30 minutes... So, of course I sign them up for different activities to enrich their knowledge and help them acquire new skills, but above all I want them to enjoy it, have fun and come back with great big smiles on their faces, because these classes may lead to their future hobbies. So the first session my son had chosen was karate. I spent a couple of weeks researching the different options and hand picked the far most recommended and reputable one. Needless to say it was also the most expensive but I really wanted to make sure his first experience is going to be as enjoyable and positive as possible. So the first lesson, he is excited, wearing his karate uniforms, mentioning something about wanting to have a black belt. Well, I could relate to that of course, every child wants to be the best, and black also happens to be my boy's favorite color. I mentioned that to the instructor, thought that at the young age of 3 they can make an exception or find some creative way to please him. No response. My son tries as well and she tells him that if he works very hard (15 years or so) he will eventually get a black belt. So, disappointed he let me tie his white belt and starts the class. This is only the first class but he tries really hard to impress the instructor and does everything she says impressively. A small positive feedback and he is SO happy! this is going great so far, so we are happy too. But then they play a well complicated game and he gets confused and is being sent to sit down with some other kids. She could add some positive feedback, to make him feel satisfied with his accomplishments, but instead she unpleasantly says:" you were not paying attention!". So he goes to sit down with the biggest disappointed face ever and when the class is over he runs back to us with tears in his eyes and his only take home message is: "I wasn't paying attention in class, I am no good in karate". So not only he did not have fun, his motivation was totally crushed. He didn't even want to hear the word karate from that day on and asked that we give back his uniforms and the white belt he didn't like in the first place.
So on we went to swimming class. Again, I researched every swimming school possible and found what seemed to be the best fit. My son loves the water and asks to go to the community pool on every chance he gets. The class consists of only 3 kids, 2 of them are mine, and ends well before schedule with all 3 kids crying and running away from the pool. This specific swimming pool has a great reputation but obviously that specific instructor wasn't a suitable instructor for kids. "I have to be strict with them if you want your kids to learn how to swim" he explained. Well, one can be strict but still nice and positive... Using a negative attitude with kids can not only hurt their learning process, it can also destroy their motivation and willingness, that's how I see it. Of course I am the over-protective mom, I am fully aware of my flaws, so that might be just me but I would not pay money for instructors that don't know how to spark and maintain kids' enthusiasm and I would certainly not pay money to instructors that have the unique talent of scaring kids away.

Kids and dogs insights

Kids and dogs

There is something enchanting about kids and dogs.

Ever since I can remember myself I wanted a dog. My sister and I used to pull tricks on my mom, try to get her to sign a piece of paper that would later be filled out with a promise to get us a dog or a statement that allows us to bring a dog home. Of course she knew us well enough to never attempt to sign those papers and so we ended up trying different approaches; once we even tried to bring a dog while mom was away for the weekend, thinking she might let us get away with it if she comes back and sees we already have a dog and we are taking good care of it while also prove we can take good care of the house. But none of these had ever worked for us and she promised that when each of us grows up and has her own house, she would buy us any dog we would like. So when I got married and moved to live with my husband in our well maintained house, mom at her first visit asked what kind of dog I wanted and I laughed, finally realizing the point she was trying to make for all those years. 'too late for me' I thought, gradually giving up the idea of having a dog. But it all changed back again when my own kids got to the age of dog begging. Now I became the mom that was standing in the way for their dream, and suddenly having a dog was no longer a long lost dream of mine, that was their dream, but I could still feel that itch every time I saw owners walking their dogs or kids giggling and playing around with their canine friend. There are so many studies that claim that growing up with a dog improves so many different aspects in our lives; self esteem, confidence, satisfaction and happiness just to name a few. It is also claimed to increase life expectancy and overall health. I felt like there was a whole distinct experience I was missing. So we decided to get a dog. We went to at least a dozen adoption events but the small dogs were not for placement with families with young kids and the bigger dogs seemed too intimidating for my inexperienced dog owner kids. So we ended up getting a Pug puppy, which is also my husband's favorite breed ever since Men in Black came to theaters. She was eight weeks when we got her, not much bigger than a scrawl, but made such a huge mess!!!

Now she is already 4.5 months old and is growing up to be an amazing dog and an amazing canine friend for all of us. Her number one priority is food of course, but right after that she is all into us. Especially the kids. And when we hear the sound of their giggles and see the smiles on their faces while playing together with her or holding her like a baby in their arms (although she is almost 10 pounds and is getting bigger and heavier) we know that we are doing the right thing for our kids. And not only that, having a dog finally makes them realize what responsibility is and teaches them to care for others.

How did I end up being a scientist, part II

So I found myself in science class, with Dr. Dagan both as my biology teacher and my home room teacher. I made minimal effort in science learning, dreaming on claiming my prize and getting into drama class without auditions in the following year. By the end of the first trimester, Dr. Dagan called me for a talk. "I still want to be an actress" I said proudly. "Of course you do" she protested. "Being in my class is not enough, you need to make some effort, you should try to learn science, not just being present in class!" At that moment I realized that if I wanted to get through those auditions I had to do better than minimal effort. So for the first time in my life I payed attention in science classes, and found myself drawn to biology. By the end of the second trimester I made first in biology class and by the end of the year there was no way in the world I would switch my major. It had seemed to become my second nature, my intuition almost. It all just seemed to make sense.And so my dream of becoming an actress started fading away on the background of biomedical studies.
The second time I had to make a somewhat similar decision was at my undergraduate studies. Everyone around me seemed to make it in Hi-tech so I was considering studying computer sciences, although, I must admit, biomedical sciences were much more appealing to me, I just thought that naturally I am expected to follow my parents' route. "No offense" my mom said when I shared my thoughts with her. "But I have no intention of helping you with your homework when you go to college too. You should pick something you are good at, something that you really like". So I studied Medical Sciences and when I got my bachelors degree I realized there was nothing to do with only a bachelors degree in this field and the same was for when I got my masters degree, so I ended up doing a PhD in biochemistry, after taking a day job in a research lab in which I ended up staying throughout my graduate studies. With the heads of the lab being my mentors; I learned how to work at the bench, how to brainstorm, how to come up with novel theories and hypotheses and how to assess them experimentally, test my ideas and find answers (although somewhat partial) to my questions. And most importantly, in contrast to any other job I had before, I was having a GREAT time!

Site change

Site change. That׳s how we call the procedure of changing the site in which my daughter's insulin pump is connected to her body. We need to do it once in every three days but I admit that sometimes I let her get away with it and wait until the fourth day. This way we spare about two site changes per month, that's 24 less site changes per year and that's a lot (well mainly for me). Unfortunately we cannot go beyond four days without taking the risk of local skin infection. Of course I have to be grateful for modern diabetes treatment. It wasn't until Insulin was discovered in 1921, that diabetes mellitus was considered a fatal disease. When the first insulin injection ever given, saved the life of a dying 14 year old diabetic boy in Canada, it was thought to be a cure. Since then a lot of money and effort was put towards developing better and smarter insulins, better ways to administer the insulin and better ways to estimate the optimal amount of insulin needed, at first by checking the amount of sugar in urine and then, when found to be not reliable nor accurate enough, ways to check sugar in blood, and in the home setting rather than the clinic or hospital setting since this is something that has to be done at least 4 times per day. It wasn't until several years ago that people finally realized that using insulin is not a cure for diabetes, it is merely a way of treating the symptoms and in order to really cure, a different solution is needed. So I am grateful for the insulin pump, that replaces the routine 4 insulin injections per day and the strict diet regimen, by 2-3 site changes per week and the freedom to eat whatever and whenever she wants, a great advantage especially when it comes to children. The insulin injections have to be taken before or immediately after a meal, to cover for the carbohydrates eaten, since in type 1 diabetes the body doesn't produce enough insulin and so is not able to use the sugar in the food for energy. Now, what would you tell a child that had already got her insulin shot, had her dinner but now wants some more? Or a dessert? Or is going to a birthday party and wants to have some candy or cake? You always have the option of giving her another insulin shot (that will make it an extra shot in addition to the 4 she has to take anyway), you can just tell her no (not un option for me, the over-protective mom that is always sure my kids didn't have enough to eat) and you can suggest she would save it for later, for the next time she is going to get a shot anyway. That was my preferred approach, but an insulin pump just solves all of these problems at once. It is connected through a port that goes into the skin (well, actually to the fat tissue - any place that you can 'pinch an inch', but in my daughter's case it is pretty hard to find a pinchable area so we just settle for skin) and infuse insulin 24/7. It is optimally programed to the individual's needs (to imitate the basal insulin secretion in the body) and insulin can be added (it is called 'bolus') every time sugars are eaten. It can also be operated by the child herself, unlike injections which require technique. These are major improvements compared to shots but still not a cure. We still need to check the blood sugar by pricking my daughter's fingers at least four times per day (our endocrinologist actually says it should be more like 6-8 times per day but we try to keep it sane). And even after more than two years of doing site changes for the pump at least twice a week, it still is a procedure, still causes some fuss from my daughter's side and still makes me feel bad for causing her pain, even tough I know it is what keeps her healthy and well. I still wish everyday, but especially after every site change, for a cure for type 1 diabetes. A real cure.

6 signs that mean you are not too happy at work

It took me several months to notice that I had started taking the longer way to work, that's when I came to realize that I really didn't like my job, it wasn't just a mild temporary dissatisfaction, It seemed like I preferred spending more time in traffic than next to my desk. And it was starting to show. This wasn't the only sign, and was actually a more gentle one. If I was to rate these signs I would rank it as number 3 out of 6. And if I was to lay out the whole list of signs I experienced it would look like that:
1. I am desperately counting the days until the next holiday / vacation / day off or even sick day.
2. Any day the boss is not around is a good day, and unfortunately vice versa applies.
3. I am deliberately choosing the longer way to work every morning, standing in traffic is much more pleasant than my office.
4. Torture, no other word is needed to describe it. Any day at this job is an unnecessary torture.
5. Career wise, my motivation is gone, not even the slightest spark of meaning or enthusiasm is left and that gradually starts to drift and spread into my personal life.
6. I am seriously considering a career change, any career path other than mine seems much more attractive, whichever that might be.
But the person who had picked this career in the first place, that was once me... And I had chosen it because I loved it, and enjoyed every minute of it. Now where was I?
I am not the quitter type but there are situations in life when we just need to turn around and walk away. The fact that I was already there didn't mean I had to stay...

Playdates

Three years here and I am still learning the customs. I have never been the kind of person that likes planing things too long in advance. Any plan would just be another item that occupies my short term memory (or long, depends on how long in advance) and seems to yet accumulate to an overall stress in our hectic daily routine which overloads my (full by default) memory cells. Setting up a playdate two days in advance is not too bad, one day in advance would even be better, but my favorite approach would be to schedule a playdate on the same day, when all parents meet up to pick up their kids from school. This allows you to avoid the build up of too much tension and excitement (the last thing you want is a child not being able to fall asleep at night waiting for the next day playdate) that could of course lead to an even bigger disappointment. This also allows to avoid last minute fights between the kids (same day playdates are usually initiated by the kids themselves anyway) and teach your kids the principle of being spontaneous, which I find to be surprisingly handy in many scenarios. We once were scheduled for a playdate 2 weeks in advance. I had to write it down in my calendar and set up a reminder on my cell phone so I don't forget. My daughter and the other friend were very excited for about a week, planning their playdate and talking about it. However, by the time that day had finally come they had a fight and my daughter (then 6 years old) didn't even want to hear that girls name.. I had to call and cancel the playdate and I think the parents were a little angry about it... Needles to say it was the first and last time we were ever invited to their house.

How did I end up being a scientist, part I

I had always dreamt of becoming an actress. I took drama classes throughout middle school and made short clips with my classmates for school assignments. The teacher loved those clips as teaching tool and that way I got away from doing the old fashion written assignments. I had a friend with a video camera, that was a rare thing to own back then, so that gave us a huge boost. We would improvise short movies and I was convinced this was the funniest and most fun profession in the world. I still believe it is so. So I signed up for drama as major in high school and had my whole career planned. There were several problems with my plan though; if you wanted to become successful in this field you had to make it big time and for that you had to go to the US, the only drawback I had with that was my English and mostly my accent which I realized was going to be hard to get rid off, but doable. The second problem was my parents, two high-tech established computer scientists, that was not quite what they had been hoping for me, saving money for my future tuition in a high ranked university, but being a teenager back then, that was the least of my concerns, only made my dream seem brighter and more desirable. The third problem, and that retrospectively, was the biggest problem of all was Dr. Dagan, my science teacher. She wanted me in her class from some reason. The way it worked in my school was that you had to choose either science or art, and cannot mix between them. Taking drama as my major would mean I would not be able to take any science class and vice versa. "With grades and accomplishments like yours you should be in my class!" she exclaimed. "The world of science needs you". She had that way of expressing herself that was just too challenging to ignore. "but I want to become an actress" I said flattered. "you can still take acting classes on your spare time after school" she said. And she was right of course. ״One year" she asked. "give me one year to show you how fascinating science can be and if by the end of this year you still dream of becoming an actress I personally guarantee that you will be accepted to the drama major class, no auditions, nothing, you are in". That was tempting enough since the auditions for that major were well known for their high expectations and low success rates. "So all I have to do is take one year of science as a major?" I was trying to make sure I understood the deal correctly, it just seemed too good to be true. "Yes" she smiled. "And if by the end of next year I decide that I want to switch to drama as major I will be..." still making sure. "Automatically accepted" she promised. So where do I sign?

Homesick

Some days I get homesick. It usually lasts in the car on my way to work. I used to not like my job so that would make a good excuse for being homesick, but I changed my job and am now enjoying myself so I can't use this excuse anymore. I wonder how our life would be back home in Israel, scroll through the old memories that always get sweeter and sweeter with time. Remember the smiling faces of my kids running around, playing outside even on the coldest winter days, that are mostly like mild spring days in the DC area, having the chance to be among the greater part of our family at least once on every weekend, surrounded with love and attention of their grandparents, unlces, aunts and cuisines. I think of this part in particular on every school event we attend. Here and there you see some grandparents that live nearby and join the party. Back home it was the daily routine. Far away there meant an hour or two hours drive, a distance you would surely take during any given weekend. far away here could mean several hours flight or for us even more than that. I sometime worry whether we are doing the right thing for our kids, raising them so far away from home. But I am also aware of the fact that, as time goes by, home for them might no longer be the place that is considered home for us.

Over-protective mom

Today I was officially diagnosed; I am an over protective mom. It started 8 years ago when my first child was born. When she was 5 and was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes I thought: well, I must have had a good reason, somehow, deep down I knew she really needed my protection, but now, when on the list of my worst fears appeared the risk of severe hypoglycemia I became the over protective mom that keeps her daughter's blood sugar on the higher side. The problem with running on the higher side is that the distance between slightly high and too high in our case is less than a quarter of a unit of Insulin per hour, and so although we follow all the medical instructions and regimen, my daughter has reached the undesired A1C levels of 8.7. What was I doing wrong? We check blood sugar at least 4 times per day, use the most sophisticated insulin pump, bolus insulin for every gram of carbohydrate eaten, correct high numbers. Why is this A1C insists on staying high?
So the problem is probably me, the over protective mom. Other than balancing my 8 year old daughter's diabetes I struggle hard to keep her life normal and sane. Make sure she eats whatever and whenever she wants, do any kind of activity that kids her age are doing, feel free, enjoy life and be a child like she should. At the same time I try to make sure that our life as a family are happy as well and that we, her parents can have a calm and carefree (within the obvious limits of course) sleep during the night. And above all that we try to make sure she stays safe and healthy. So I think we get at least 85% of it right, with the A1C populating most of the remaining 15%. Not good enough. But what am I doing wrong? I am probably doing too much. I know I should just learn to let go sometimes, risk a lower blood sugar once in a while for a better blood sugar control. So we are back to my own diagnosis. How do you treat an over protective mom?